Monday, 28 February 2011

England Expectorates

Another chocker weekend of sport and there's so much good stuff you could be talking about.

I could bang on about plucky Brum and their team of attractive and rational individuals like Barry Sneaky V-Sign Ferguson and Lee 'Leave Your Foot In' Bowyer. Couldn't happen to a nicer bunch of lads.

What do them initials stand for I wonder...

This was one of them finals when I didn't want the outsiders to nick it. Trouble was Birmingham never really looked like outsiders, did they?

They have a lot of big lads. Arsenal have a couple of centre-backs with all the permanence of a sandcastle at high tide. I got a cool fifty quid putting not much on Zigic to score the first (and only, I hoped) goal.

You could stereotype the game as Beauty v The Beast. Except on this occasion you wouldn't have Penelope Cruz playing Arsenal, you'd have Kate Hudson or some other cute dimwit lightweight who's not as good as she thinks she is.

I still think Gooners could back off Wenger. Christ knows they get more entertainment at the Emirates Library in ninety minutes than most of us get in a season. But Arsene needs a bloody solid centre-back or three and, like it or not, a midfielder who treats tippy-tappers like so many kit-kat fingers. A Yaya Toure without the flagrant self-interest.

Still, well done Brum, you ugly buggers, you earned it... and bad luck Sczeszensczennyyyeny or whatever your name is. Twas a howler of such note that your UK passport must be a matter of days away.

One might also want to praise the tie between India and England. It was edge of your toilet seat stuff. And a great fillip for a tournament that has so far resembled a contest between a runaway Eurostar and an IKEA bookshelf.

Good stuff from Steve Davis, too, who has boldly announced his homosexuality to the cricketing world. Stand by for snorts of euphemistic guffawing next time someone catches him in the gully, pulls him over the boundary, or swings it both ways.

Seriously though, it's pretty close to not being much of a big deal which shows you how far we've come. (Steady innuendo-ists).

We might also congratulate European Golf on having the top four players in the world at the mo. Except that golf is not a sport but rather, as my mate Andy Smart insists, a paid holiday in Pringle.

We might also want to praise the continentally unpopular concrete-poured-into-pillow-cases that is the England Rugby Union Team. Apparently they beat France.

I didn't follow much of it. Since they brought in them tight-fitting T-shirts and God-knows what sort of dietary enhancements most of them rugby lads look like the sort of sun-lamped brawny tossers who twenty years back used to waddle into your local bar with muscles like a rockslide and a face like a jar of sultanas.

The rugby players I grew up watching - your Phil Bennetts and Gareth Edwards - well these blokes'd use them as ear-plugs.

But instead we're left to ponder that Regurgitatable Sign Of Our Times, the Errant England Footballer. If they're not elbowing you in the face, they're bringing an air rifle to work and shooting you. Allegedly.

First Rooney. He ran past James McCarthy and elbowed him in the face. The ball was somewhere in the next postal district at the time. God knows why. Has McCarthy been sneaking round to Colleen while Wazza's down the tobacconists?

Even John Hartson says it was indefensible. That's John Hartson, a man who had to go and find Eyal Berkovic's head in the nettles after a training-ground bust-up.

Let's look at what Sir Alex Ferfuckssakuson said about the incident: 'There was nothing in it'. Gaddafi-esque in its neglect of the truth.

'I don't think the boy touched McCarthy. They are all on drugs and working for Al Qaeda if you ask me'

The Govan Beetroot added: 'The press will raise a campaign to get him hung by Tuesday or electrocuted or something like that.' Erm, that's just a twat's thing to say. Maybe the country would've liked to see the recommended dose of three games off for the petulant hairy toddler. At the very least some calpol for the stroppy little bugger.

And this is what stirs up the ABU brigade. Clattenburg's said he's happy about what happened at the DW. Rooney gets clean away with it. No fine. No ban. No nowt. Just carry on as usual. Heck he could be a frigging merchant banker, couldn't he?

Carlo Ancelotti claims there's nowt wrong with discipline at Chelsea either after Ashley Cole SHOT someone. It's been dealt with apparently. Cole has apologised. For SHOOTING someone. Given their goal-shy form of late it's to see someone's bothering to shoot.

But can you believe it?! Really?! Well yes, it's Ashley Cole. Letting of an air-rifle is as pathetically schoolboy an error he could still be defending at Arsenal. What next, Cashley? Flicking gobs of chewed-up paper at John Obi-Mikel?

I expect Cole is the first on the team bus to shout 'The one who denied it supplied it.'

'Keep smiling darlin' I've got an air-rifle pointed at your back...'
What all this leads you to is two conclusions:

1. If you play for United you could rob a train in broad daylight without a mask on and Fergie would say it was nowt and the FA would agree.

2. There's not an England player in this country who has the remotest concept of reality. I mean we could take a fiver a week out of their pockets and build an NHS hospital in every town - and that way we'd have an A&E on standby should Rooney come drop in with a munk on.

374 comments:

  1. First

    G'day all

    Speaking of pies... can anyone tell me if the mansies pie and mash shops still exist in London?

    No need to apologise Rod, you are a Un**ed fan, your behaviour is expected.

    AH. We have this thing about going ahead of Un**ed.. it's like, if we do then everyone will expect us to win something, it's far better if people have a low expectation of us.

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  2. This was one of them finals when I didn't want the outsiders to nick it

    Strange that - I felt the same.

    Wathced - Englan beat france and the draw with india and celtic get beat - and Boro - ermmmmmmmmm - saying nowt!!!

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  3. Good blog Robbo. Clattenfuck is obviously on Un**ed's payroll. He should never be allowed to referee any Un**ed games and especially when played at OT.

    I have to agree with you Robbo... there is no player more deserving of receiving a winners medal than Lee Bowyer. It's been a long time coming and is richly deserved. Now he will hopefully go away and die in a shit filled gutter in Aden or somewhere equally pleasant.

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  4. good blog robbo. spot on about SAF how does that cunt get away with it? its increasingly like listening to the defence council for myra hindley

    gooners have only arsene to blame. he keeps making the same bleeding obvious error...purism doesn't f-in well work v brum, stoke and the other primate lower prem teams so why bother trying .

    I bet his defenders- last seen name checked on an opticians eye chart- can do one billion keepy UPS but what use is that v a 6foot 8 east European apeman? none.

    I think he's insane. he's taken them as far as he can, he should go especially if this quadruple season ends in embarrassing quadruple failure

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  5. I was surprised to hear Steve "interesting" Davis has turned gay and therefore taken up cricket but I had heard that he liked to pot the brown

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  6. Cracking blog Robbo. Was a good weekend of sport, and an odd one too. I think most people who don't support Utd would have wanted Arsenal to win the cup. I think this season will be another trophyless one for Arsene unless they can get past Utd in the FA Cup. That will of course depend on who is reffing the game. How Rooney can get away with an assault when everyone saw it is beyond me. If a rule says that if the ref saw it and took no further action, then a disciplinary panel can't do anything about it, then that rule needs changing. Especially with the level of refereeing in the Premiership. Rooney elbows a guy in the side of the head, and the next minute the ref has his arm round his shoulders and they're sharing a joke. If McCarthy had gone down in a heap and started crying like Ronaldo would have, then it would have been interesting to see what happened.

    I can't wait for Fergie to fuck off so Utd stop getting favours from refs, and certain managers start playing proper sides against them. It seems to me that managers like Allardyce and Bruce give Utd 6 points every season quite happily, and yet get stuck in to other top teams. Well it cost Fat Sam his job this season, rolling over 7-1 to Utd, and embarrassing his new owners in the process. The sooner this Fergie bum-fucking (Steve Davis reference) stops, by managers, refs, the BBC, and the FA, the better. The cock.

    Apart from that, good morning chaps and chapess.

    P.S. Anyone see a resemblance between Gadaffi and Michael Jackson? Just me then.

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  7. Robbo, if you are fed up with your footballers, what say you about the US of A's "soccer players"?

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  8. great stuff Robbo, shame Rooney wasn't playing in that Rugby match, he'd be out for at least 4 years on disability by now. More importantly, if he'd got sent off I'd have won the ffsl match against Spit. As an aside, Ghadaffi looks a bit like my brother after a week on the pop.

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  9. In that picture of the Coles, Cheryl is trying in desperation to keep Ashely from grabbing her tit.

    What a tit.

    All three of them.

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  10. now we know it was a shotgun wedding.

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  11. Great blog as always although I believe Steve Davis' is the snooker player while Davies is the cricket variety.

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  12. What is the average IQ of the twats who, every week, feel they have somehow achieved something of note by commenting first on this blog?

    I'm guessing it's about 8, which is excusable if the figure is also commensurate with their age.

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  13. it's probably about the same as the anonymous twats that post 13th.

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  14. Great blog as usual ROBBO

    and RIP Jane, you were very very buxom

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  15. Morning all.
    Rooney deserved atleast 3 match ban. But he does'nt get it. Cashley deserves being jailed, but he too escapes without punishment. Guess, they are the modern day English demi-gods; hence no body dares punish them.

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  16. I think Un**ed's next 2 games itself will tell which way the title is going. If they get 2 or less points, Arsenal will still be in with a shout. If they get 4 points, SAF will laugh his way to OT happily. But if they do manage to win all 6 points - Title race over. Un**ed will be the champions.

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  17. SS11 - If Man Utd get 4 points from the next two and then win all their games to the end of the season except the one against the Gunners and Arsenal win all their games to the end of the season, including the game against Fergie's grandads, Arsenal will be champions I think. However, I realise that both teams winning all their games to the end of the season is uunlikely, these next two Man utd games do not mean the title race is over. It wont be over until Arsenal bollox it up in the most embarrasing way ever (which, considering Sunday, will have to be pretty spectacular).

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  18. Nigerian United Fan

    Great blog Robbo, while i didn't see the incident becuse I missed about 65 mins of the match i think Rooney really has to curb his temper for him to be a truely great player.

    His actions were inexcusable but i dont think there is any team in the prem without a player who loses his head and gets away with it. I remember Bosingwa kicking benayoun at the corner flag and the FA did nothing. It has nothing to do with SAF, but has everything to do with the FA rule that allows it. If the FA makes a player who commits a foul, dives, simulates or commits any other infringement liable to punishmnet based on a video review, that will definitely put an end to all this nonsense.

    By the way robbo I recall Pogatetz trying to surgically remove Ronaldos neck before a corner was taken and the referree did nothing.

    Now all this nonsense about teams being hard on Arsenal should stop, they seem to forget the Lauren strangling Phil Neville episode, or the Keown and Co. bashing of Nilsterooy, or that the whole Arsenal team tried to kick Evra back to Monaco after he made the "men against boys" comment.

    Arsene should wake up, even the eternal purists Barcelona dont mind diving, conninig the referee, time wasting or scoring with the hand when it serves their purpose.

    He should just buy quality rugged english centre backs like Johnson of Birmingham and not all these namby pamby fresh faced french boys. For Christ sakes Chamakh and Bendtner could not take advantage of a centre back that was hobbling for at least 15 mins. BUY BRITISH ARSENE

    RANT OVER

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  19. BUY BRITISH?

    Why not nigerian? They'd be lot cheaper, innit?

    OR, Arsene could send his account details and they'd ship him a ship load?

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  20. Ian Bell says that the England team are right behind Steve Davis.

    Probably the safest place to be isn't it?

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  21. Nigerian United Fan

    Spit name one decent Nigerian center half in the prem and I'll name one decent arsenal keeper in the prem.

    Wait a minute that's not right , there are no Nigerian Center halves in the prem and apparently no Arsenal keepers either.

    We'll have to call it a draw then

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  22. Morning All

    to all you Gunners, I would like it to be known that unlike a certain ManU supporter on here my reaction to your losing on Sunday was not

    Lets all laugh at Arsenal, lets all laugh at Arsenal! Nah nah nah nah, HEY! Nah nah nah nah, HEY!
    Lets all laugh at Arsenal, lets all laugh at Arsenal! Nah nah nah nah, HEY! Nah nah nah nah, HEY!

    although admitedly that was Mr BHBs reaction, (mine was more of an involuntary snigger)
    so I am counting on you all to at least whisper your support for the Chavs tonight.

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  23. So Cunt of the Year 2011 has Rooney and Cole leading the running. Dunno what anyone has to do to top what those dickheads have achieved so far.

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  24. I loved the way the Cashley incident was reported in the sports news here in Oz - just that he had shot a student, then cut to Ancelotti saying 'Who has never made a mistake in their life? Who?'

    No mention that it was just an air rifle, and not a proper gun.

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  25. Noel , you don't want facts (especially if yiu are Rafa) to get in the way of a 'good' story

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  26. It's proper enough Noel to cause real damage.

    http://www.wave3.com/story/12140277/11-year-old-dies-after-being-shot-with-bb-rifle?redirected=true

    http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2009/01/passaic_county_woman_killed_by.html

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/1896140.stm

    http://www.gun-control-network.org/Airgun%20Incidents%202010.pdf

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  27. mat_newton said...
    SS11 - If Man Utd get 4 points from the next two and then win all their games to the end of the season except the one against the Gunners and Arsenal win all their games to the end of the season, including the game against Fergie's grandads, Arsenal will be champions I think. However, I realise that both teams winning all their games to the end of the season is uunlikely, these next two Man utd games do not mean the title race is over. It wont be over until Arsenal bollox it up in the most embarrasing way ever (which, considering Sunday, will have to be pretty spectacular).
    --------------------

    Actually as United are currently 4 points clear having played teh same number of games United would be champions by 1 point

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  28. Read this late, was initally astounded to read that Steve Davis has come out, was going to make a suitably ribald comment involving Ray Reardon or somesuch, but blogdignag beat me to it.
    Just in case you've been on the moon for the past five years, can I take this opportunity to say that Ashley Cole is a twat?

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  29. All this talk of Arsenal winning the league having manu ballsed it up is purely academic.

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  30. Thank you SS - i knew at least one of you gooners would see sense in the end ...

    Hows the cricket going (to be honest I only ask out of politeness)?

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  31. Well, talking about cricket Bells..we're just about a week old in the world cup and alreayd 2 potential match fixing stories in the papers..one with the india fielders not appealing when strauss was caught behind twice(er..wicketkeeper taking catch, nothing like what it sounds) ....and then some Sri Lankan newspaper accusing their former captain and anotehr batsman of purposefully losing against Pakistan.

    Is there a blatter-equivalent in cricket, making sure the game is run to the ground?

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  32. What is this talk of whispering support Bells..i will be screaming myself hoarse in support of the chavs (lesser of the two evils and all that)

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  33. AH, I was hoping that surely us Chavs cant be hated that much that 'neutrals' would be whooping it up for ManPoo tonight.

    As for that match fixing in the world cup, well that's just not cricket is it?

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  34. Actually I'll tell you what would make everything right in the world, a gratuitous (sp?) picture of Jose Mourinho

    If gratuitous isn't the right word, then a semi-naked one will do ...

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  35. well nearly home/wine time - have a good evening everyone except all you Prawn sandwich eating Man U supporters, I hope you have a very miserable evening and that we thrash you 378 - 1 (or 2-0 would do)

    GO CHELSEA

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  36. Van Persie is out for 3 weeks. And certainly all's well with the world

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  37. AnfieldHopeful said...
    Shit..headed for 6th straight loss..am feeling a bit like roberto de matteo now. slim chance of deafeating colch if berbatov starts and gets a couple of goals while rooney does zilch.

    ----------------------------------------
    Awfully nice of SAF to keep Berbatov (league's leading scorer to boot) on the bench for the second fucking game in a row.

    How much did you pay him Colch?

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  38. AH, you only miss out on 2 points seeing as Un**ed are going to remain scoreless while losing to the chavs this evening (morning).

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  39. Chelsea's chances have taken a further boost... Scholes is playing.

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  40. Is the Ginger Ninja going to play next season? I've lost track now.

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  41. Speaking of which, wonder how STGP is getting along now ...

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  42. By god, that bit of defending by chelsea in awarding Rooney the freedom of the bridge is even worse than the clearance by koschielny that never was.

    top strike mind.

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  43. If this finishes 11 v 11 I'll be amazed.

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  44. Wenger, pay attention you nut, thats how you win or lose titles. defence. defence. defence.

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  45. so why didnt chelsea play their contingent of torres, drogba, anelka?

    ah, they are? no they arent!

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  46. At least Rooney hit it with his foot this time.

    Hopefully Chelsea will take the girls off at half time and play their proper team in the second half. As much as I hate to say it, Un**ed deserve their lead.

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  47. The french never defended anything successfully, did they?

    1:1

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  48. Well played Luiz: worth every single of the 35,000,000,00 pennies spent on him.

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  49. OK, I can go to my imaginary job happy now... Un**ed without Vidic at Anfield could pose a problem or two... are the wheels falling off... can hope I guess.

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  50. wot a wonderful game this was. Boooooooooooing.

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  51. Congratulations Bells. Good result for your boys. A draw would have been good, from a Spurs point of view, but always a happy occasion when Utd lose. Ironic to hear Fergie complaining about decisions going against his team. Wow, it must be tough for him never getting it his way.

    MR - I know air guns can do real damage. I have been shot by one before, but it was at a distance so it just stung a bit. I was just saying how that little bit of information was completely left out of the news report, leaving it up to the viewer to decide what kind of gun it was. Until I read the BBC report, I was imagining him behind a sandbag bunker, camoflaged with branches sticking out of his beanie with a GPMG and maybe an RPG for backup, mowing down hordes of YTS kids. You can imagine my disappointment.

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  52. perfect result. ManU lost..Torres didnt score. Good day at the PL.

    On the other hand, got a beaten easily by Colch and now at risk of dropping out of the top 10 next week.

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  53. Manchester United manager Alex Ferguson said he "feared the worst" when Martin Atkinson was chosen to referee his side's 2-1 defeat by Chelsea.
    =================================================

    It's a bit unfair really, I don't like to see ol' rednose upset like that. Un**ed are trying to win the title after all, Clattenfuckup should be appointed to the Un**ed match every week.

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  54. With Wes Brown partnering Smalling in central defence at Anfield, Liverpool have a great chance of taking the points this week. Then again, their defensive effort against the Hammers was bloody terrible, so they will need to improve in that area too.

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  55. As somebody mentioned earlier, if Arsenal win in from here the title is theirs.

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  56. ..... but don't tell them that else they'll find a way to fuck it up.

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  57. Bo,

    dontcha sweat. Manu may drop more points but arsenal wont be picking many either. RvP and Walcott are out for a min of 3 weeks and vermaelen still injured.

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  58. Vidic you cunt you ruined my week. I was on for a good score if it weren't for him.

    That said, losing 5 points for his sending off is ma small price to pay to hear Fergie wail about how a ref wasn't in his pocket/ up his arse .... hysterically funny to hear him kicking off about that.

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  59. Rooney stays on pitch, Ref's the only one with some credit.

    Luiz stays on pitch, un-fucking-believable.

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  60. That maybe so Spit but as things are the the moment the PL is Arsenal's to lose... and they will most likely do that this week.

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  61. dont agree Bo,

    how can you lose summat you dont have?

    Arsenal are 4 points behind with some tough games ahead without our best players of the season out.

    dont have a prayer

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  62. They are four points behind with a game in hand and they play Un**ed at the Emirates... Un**ed have some tough games to go too.

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  63. Morning all.

    So well done Chelsea. You did your job well last night to get a win. Next up is Liverpool's turn to help the cause. Having said that, Arsenal need to do it on their own if they have to win the league.

    SAF complains about Luiz not being sent-off. Agreed. But when the same being asked about Rooney's against Wigan, he said there's nothing in it at all and matter was closed when Ref booked him.

    Talk about double standards and first name that comes to my mind is Sir Alex.

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  64. Bells,
    Cricket is doing good. No surprises so far apart from a few mindless controversies. My Indian team is a bit like Arsenal - very strong in batting, but pathetic weak in bowling.

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  65. AH,
    I havent heard about Strauss catch not appealed story. However Dhoni was very critical of Ian Bell's LBW decision not given out even after reviewing through UDRS system.

    I hope the WC stays clean throughout, no match fixing and spot fixing bothers I would want to hear. Just sit back and enjoy high scores of 300+ in every game.

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  66. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  67. Noel- Fair point, that would be a story. I wonder if the work experience lad would have kept his placement if he had brought an air rifle to the Cobham training ground and shot Cole?

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  68. mostly redundant said...
    Noel- Fair point, that would be a story. I wonder if the work experience lad would have kept his placement if he had brought an air rifle to the Cobham training ground and shot Cole?

    -----

    thats what the Victoria Cross is for.

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  69. Luiz looks like a quality player. Good with the ball, strong in the air and against physical players, reads the game well and has that bit of Brazilian flair to him.

    He won me over with that body check on Rooney that was 'nothing' really.

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  70. Daniel Sturridge has hinted he could try to make his loan move from Chelsea to Bolton permanent. The striker has scored four goals in as many league games and says he is revelling in the freedom given to him by Trotters boss Owen Coyle.
    ____________

    That would be a very smart move. Chelsea have Torres, Drogba and Anelka and he wont be getting starts to many games ahead of all three for the 2 years at least. A cut price deal where Chelsea have the first refusal on any future sale would be great for Bolton, Chelsea and Sturridge.

    KD is getting on a bit and with Almandy still a hot-cold flash in the pan, he could be playing every single game for the trotters.

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  71. Arsenal are hoping to arrange a swap deal that would result in Brazilian midfielder Denilson moving to Juventus and his compatriot Felipe Melo heading in the opposite direction.
    ------------

    Dont know what wenger sees in him really. He may be huge unit but he's got no pace and tackles like scholes

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  72. Tottenham are considering a move for Arsenal striker Nicklas Bendtner who is frustrated at the lack of first-team opportunities at the Emirates
    ----------

    well, wudda ya know, Bendy, strap on those siully pink boots of yours and march right to the front with that stupid chewing mouth of yours.

    seriously, has anyone ever seen a player chewing gum in a sport where sudden bursts of pace, change of direction and jumps in the air are required?

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  73. England manager Fabio Capello is considering calling up Celtic striker Gary Hooper, who has scored 15 goals in 22 games for the Bhoys since his summer move from Scunthorpe.
    ----------

    Not sure we need League One level players in the national team.

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  74. Bendy to Spurs? Oh for fuck's sake we've already got 3 non scoring strikers and a 4th out on loan ... guarantee we'll get him then.

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  75. I hear what your saying Spit, but maybe we do. It might stick a rocket up the pre-madonna's who on occasion turn up if they aren't "injured".

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  76. red nose whinging again eh pratt!!!

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  77. Morning all and what a wonderful morning it is too

    Biased aside thought we played as well as we have for a long time - not that hard admittedly - and yep, David Luiz was slightly fortuante to still be on pitch but that has to be karma.

    Rooney is starting to really irritate me with his silly celebration pose, it's like someone standing on a springboard ready to leap off, whats that name again? Oh yes, diver.

    AH, I shall return the favour and shout til I can shout no more for Liverpool on Sunday (that takes a lot for Chelsea fan to say) and hope that Arsenals season doesn't complete collapse as would much rather them win the league than ManU.

    Noel, hopefully between the 'two of us' we can squeeze Man City into fifth?

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  78. well done bells..good stuff.

    With the notable exception of adam and rod, this blog has suddenly turned into an arsenal supporters blog. Scousers cheering for the chavs, who return the favor. everyone cheering for clattenburg.

    SS - spot on mate..SAF is double standards personfied.

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  79. Looking good for England at the mo - and more importantly, it's looking good for my fantasy cricket team. Strauss did ok, Trott just clocked up his 50, and Broad and Bresnan both fit and ready to take some Irish wickets. Get in.

    Bells, I'd be very happy if the two of us could squeeze City down to 5th. I think they may be starting to feel the pressure themselves, as a few weeks back they seemed a lot further ahead of us. I can't see Mancini being there next season if they finish 5th again. Spurs are starting to get some players back fit too. VDV and Huddlestone are due back this week, Bale maybe the week after.

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  80. What a fucking bastard of a result last night.

    I think Chelsea just about deserved it but Chelsea should've been down to 10 men and United started to lose their heads a bit towards the end which is a bit strange for them.

    On the whole Fergie has double standards point.... ofcourse he has. Every manager has. Ask Wenger a similar question about one of his players and he'll say he didn't see it. Fergie was ripping because year after year United get nothing at the Bridge and get all the decisions against them, be it goals being scored from free kicks that were never free kicks, goals being scored when there are fouls on defenders, hand balls in the box when the ball is blasted at a downward pointing arm.

    Unfortunately due to the unanimous amount of hatred towards united people easily forget or choose to ignore these things.

    Also, there may be a little bit of irony about the whole Luiz and Rooney thing but really they're completely different. Rooney was going to be fouled so he lifted his arm to shove the guy out've the way but I admit completely went over the top. Luiz was just a dirty fucker throwing his weight around. How a guy who should've been sent off twice gets man of the match I dunno. I'm not convinced about him yet. Lets see what people think at the end of the season.

    Rant over.

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  81. Rod - Why drag Wenger into this?

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  82. Also, Unfortunately due to the unanimous amount of love towards United you easily forget or most of the times choose to ignore those other things.

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  83. My heart bleeds for Fergie. Really, it does. Stop laughing in the back seats!!

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  84. Jealousy, pure jealousy. SS11, not sure what you mean.

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  85. oooh..didnt realize the gooner-Os replay was today. seems to be a decent footy game on almost every day nowadays. nice.

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  86. AnfieldHopeful said...
    oooh..didnt realize the gooner-Os replay was today. seems to be a decent footy game on almost every day nowadays. nice



    Yes, but I shall definitely be supporting the Mighty O's tonight (don't want to give the gooners ideas that we want them to be too successful)

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  87. Wow, England are really doing their best to lose to Ireland today ... fielding and bowling have been shite for the most part.

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  88. Fucking hell .... who are these wankers wearing our colours on the field? They don't look like the team we sent abroad to win the Ashes.

    ReplyDelete
  89. what were the odds on another tie featuring England?

    How much did the english learn from their series against pakistan?

    ReplyDelete
  90. Never mind the tie, what odds for ireland to win it at toss?

    what odds for ireland to win with 328 to chase?

    ReplyDelete
  91. you Sirs, have bolloxed it royally.

    Well played the leperchauns

    ReplyDelete
  92. We must be the only team that can have really close matches against Netherlands, India and Ireland with 1 win, 1 tie and 1 loss. Never a dull moment for england supporters is there?

    ReplyDelete
  93. mornin' Lads, all this sport with so many talking points leaves no time for posting!

    Well done Bells, 'bout time your luck changed.

    Congrats to Gaz wherever you are on the greatest day in your cricket history, maybe you have a nipper by now too?

    ReplyDelete
  94. BLUEHELLSBELLS said...
    Yes, but I shall definitely be supporting the Mighty O's tonight (don't want to give the gooners ideas that we want them to be too successful)
    -------------------------------------------
    Couldnt agree more Bells. The PL title instead of ManU is as far as Im willing to go. Ah well, if they beat the Os, then Im willing to grant them the FA Cup should they take ManU out of that one as well .

    ReplyDelete
  95. Arsenal v Leyton Orient line-ups:
    Arsenal: Almunia, Eboue, Squillaci, Miquel, Gibbs, Denilson, Diaby, Rosicky, Bendtner, Chamakh, Henderson.
    -----------------------------------------
    AW definitely being disrespectful to the Os by playing this team. I refer to Almunia of course.

    ReplyDelete
  96. I am sick of the sight of Rosicky so naturally, he's the only one to remain from the XI that started in the final on sunday.

    ReplyDelete
  97. Yup, him and what mainly look like the Arsenal U10's Spit.

    Oh and Almoonia.

    ReplyDelete
  98. The expected result at the Emirates... The second half saw Arsenal going through the motions and the O's, on occasion, having a bit of a go. It's off to OT next in the cup... wont bother me if we lose there... prefer to win the league personally.

    ReplyDelete
  99. Al right O's, you earned your run in the FA cup.

    Now dont go spend all of that on french defenders and polish keepers. They are pants.

    ReplyDelete
  100. West Ham skipper Matthew Upson says his 21-year-old defensive colleague James Tomkins has what it takes to play for England.
    ===================================================

    I agree with Upson, Tomkins is an excellent centre back and deserves an opportunity in the England line up or at least the squad.

    ReplyDelete
  101. Bo, why would we need a young promising central defender when we've got Rio, JT, Carragher? They're good for another 10 years at least. We should build the team around them.

    ReplyDelete
  102. The problem with this english cricket team is that they are playing too many england players. They should go back to the old tried and tested method of using South African, Irish, Pakistani and Indian players

    ReplyDelete
  103. Hahaha, I spoke yesterday about no upsets in WC. And then it happened... Unbelievable the way England lost. Infact I think the main reason for the loss was fielding. But brilliant batting by Kevin O'Brien. That should give us a warning sign for Indians coz they face Ireland on Sunday.

    ReplyDelete
  104. A normal routine win against the O's. I am not sure how much Bendtner's confidence will increase with that hat-trick when he faces Barcelona next week. But a win is a win and it must have done good mood back in the camp after Sunday's.

    Ofcourse all theoritical, the main business is yet to be delivered and all are aware of that.

    ReplyDelete
  105. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/teams/m/man_utd/9412330.stm
    ---------------
    This should teach a lesson to the Old man.

    ReplyDelete
  106. I guess you are right Noel... the old hands will be there to ensure we win fuck all for the next 4-6 years at least.

    ReplyDelete
  107. Alright, speaking of old hands. i think its time collingwood (and i absolutely love colly) makes way for wright. and possibly yardy for bopara.

    could pakistan follow suit and go out against canada today? Pakistan have a better bowling side than england did though, so should probably be able to defend a lower total. That being said, afridi is still out there so it may not be a lower total.

    ReplyDelete
  108. I know the England team isn't exactly made up of nothing but English players, but check out these traditional Canadian names currently playing against Pakistan: Kumar, Gunasekera, Surkari, Bagai, Hansra, Cheema, Chauhan, Baidwan, Osinde, Rao. That's 10 of the 11 of the field.

    ReplyDelete
  109. And Afridi goes. Thanks AH! He's in my fantasy team.

    ReplyDelete
  110. If it makes you feel better Noel, he's my captain :). I see you have displaced jacks from the 2nd place and are fast closing in on me. good show mate!

    ReplyDelete
  111. Sweet. That'll be down to my captain for the day - de Villiers. I've decided to make an effort seeing as my footie fantasy team is beyond repair.

    ReplyDelete
  112. I just took a look through your team - are you the Claudio Ranieri of cricket? Only 5 transfers left! I thought I'd gone through a lot, but I still have 27 left.

    ReplyDelete
  113. Im rafa the tinkerbell. fact.

    actually, i'm going to be running into a really busy spell at work next 2-3 weeks with no time for the FFLs so running through my transfers while i still have the time. worked till now, but once you guys start using your transfers, i'll probably find myself battling with trotts for the last spot by the time i get back here.

    ReplyDelete
  114. Well done to Arsenal but I think this 606'er has a point regarding the attidude of some of the younger Arsenal imports:-

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/606/A82078202

    ReplyDelete
  115. mr,

    the proud 606er Orient fan's complaint re bentner not celebrating his hatrick like it was in the WC final lack ground. Bentner was of course also on the pitch as that burmingham goal went in the 89th minute on sunday.

    you'd forgive the players and the fans to be a bit under the effects of it.

    I am sure all concerned with arsenal rejoice success as much as anybody.

    Even the smaller clubs.

    ReplyDelete
  116. mornin' all.

    Bo, in response to the question you posed 3 days ago, the answer is 'yes'.....

    http://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/Restaurant_Review-g186338-d1517032-Reviews-Manzies_Pie_and_Mash-London_England.html

    ReplyDelete
  117. thats 'against the smaller clubs'

    ReplyDelete
  118. Spit,

    I suspect it was beause they know their going to lose against United anyway so it was a hollow victory........................I jest of course.

    I suppose if Bendtner had of really celebrated it could of been shown to be be a lack of respect to the O's tremendous effort over 2 legs.

    A question :- Would Arsenal fans rather they won the Champions League, Premiership,this season?

    I know what Chelsea, Liverpool and Utd would want . Champions league, Qualify for next years UEFA cup and Premier League, respectively ;)

    ReplyDelete
  119. MR, the only competition that matters in football is the FA Cup. I say this mindful of the small coincidence that we're still in it.

    ReplyDelete
  120. Sorry I didn't mention the FA cup Trotts. The reason I didn't mention it with regards to Arsenal, Utd and Chelsea is that it's pretty obvious it's a shoe in for Bolton innit?

    ReplyDelete
  121. MR,
    I think Wenger made it clear in his post match interview yesterday winning the league is top priority and in other competitions they are going to try hard and play usual football without being bothered about the results.

    ReplyDelete
  122. I'd rather we win the champions league for its the only one missing.

    People harp on about how its bin 6 bluddy years since we won summat but they are all fickle.

    I for one am well chuffed the way overall our team has played over that last decade and over. Sure, they could have won more had they bought more.

    says a lot about it really.

    ReplyDelete
  123. SS11,
    I didn't see the interview but anyone would say that. What kind of a signal would it send to their next opponents if he said otherwise? The media at home would jump on it to.

    The next opponents for Arsenal in the Champions league (or their media) though won't care about the statement as they have their own domestic issues to contend with.

    Anyway I did not ask what Wenger wanted I was asking what Arsenal fans would prefer? It would be a nice new addition to the rest of the admittedly dusty trophy cabinet.

    ReplyDelete
  124. Spit,
    You can work hard all day, all year and if you are paid peanuts for the efforts you put in. How would you feel when you know you deserved to earn more?

    I think same applies for Arsenal - In all previous seasons too we have been very good till Jan, Feb and challenging on all fronts and then it falls apart. So a trophy is must this season and would go as the best reward for all the good work the team has done, for Wenger who shown belief in sticking to his transfer policies.

    ReplyDelete
  125. MR,
    Personally I'd want us to win the league as well.

    ReplyDelete
  126. SS,

    sory to disappoint you but I dont think we deserve to win any competition this season. The team hasnt beeen consistent enough in the league, has lost theo, cesc and rvp to injury to be of any threat to barca, must overcome a manU team thats on the up and did not 'want' the CC as much as the burmingham players did.

    football and deserve dont mix.

    ReplyDelete
  127. It's an interseting point about injuries Spit. The over crowded fixtures list must be causing all these injuries for all the 'big' clubs but in a way it keeps them above the smaller clubs because their squad's strength and depth will never be able to compete unless they focus on one objective to be able to do so.

    And we have seen how the authorities deal with that e.g. Blackpool and Wolves.

    Different subject but still relevant is the Cricket World Cup. It's been made sure the top seeds go through by having a ridiculous top four in each group to go through so the big teams can recover from a 'blip'.

    ReplyDelete
  128. MR,

    I have mixed feelings about the minnows in the cricket world cup. On the one hand, it makes for 20 meaningless games in foremost competition in the sport. But for every 20 of those games there are a couple like ireland beating pak last time and england now..canada almost overcoming pak today etc. which must be doing a lot of cricket in those countries. Maybe reducing the number of minnow teams in the tournament might be the answer.

    ReplyDelete
  129. mr,

    re the injuries:

    thing is, all teams have injuries, such is the nature of the game, the manager must ensure there is enough quality in the squad to cover for a missing player. Arsenal's problem is that if Fabregas is injured, there is no-one in the team who can play in the similar role, Nasri may be good in attack but he comes up short when some grit is required to weather the storm while the opponent presses, Wilshire is learning at pace but if fabregas were to leave in summer the player to suffer the most will be the young jack.

    In strike force, arsenal is two different teams with or without Robin van Persie which is a shame for the dutchman has rarely played more than 20 games a season in his 6 years in north london. Again, a world class player but no adequate cover.

    In defence, Vermaelen was fantastic in finally replacing Toure (a year after he left) and he is phenominal on ground and in air given his rather avg. height. Djourou may be having a decent run but his partners in squillaci and koscelney are frankly not worthy of gracing Tony adam's boots.

    and dont get me started on keepers...

    all in all, while most take joy in how arsenal have underachieved for the last 6 years, I am pleasantly surprised at how they have over achieved in finishing each season where they have.

    still gutted at every loss, mind.

    ReplyDelete
  130. AH,
    I agreee, but these smaller teams don't get ICC funding like Test teams. Bangladesh do and I think they have only ever won two tests in their history and don't appear to be improving.

    Maybe it's time for for countries like the Netherlands and Ieland to get it?

    Spit,
    I'm completely with you, I would rather my team play like Arsenal and win nothing and play good football than play long ball and win trophies otherwise what's the point? Come on the Tangerines!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  131. Can't see why Ireland and Netherlands can't be test teams. We've got Bangladesh and Zimbabwe are returning to the test fold.

    ReplyDelete
  132. Evening lady and gents, been a bit busy the last few days and after Sunday needed a break from footyblogs for a bit.

    Congrats to Brum, another keystone cop moment in our defence cost us a chance of a trophy. I had a bad feeling when I saw Rosciky in the starting XI (I would of went with Bendy) and it got worse when RvP hobbled off, but fair play to the blues who I thought were well worth the victory.

    A few bad decisions involving refs and IOU this week, how the hell did James McCarthy manage to stay on the field after blatently headbutting Wonder Wayne's elbow? The cowards at the FA also refusing to take action because the incident had already been "dealt with". Funny that, I seem to remember incidents (e.g Ben Thatcher) when punishment was later dished out, maybe I just dreamed it. Anyway, Sir F word said "there was nothing in it" so lets just leave it there shall we (FA style).

    SAF also said after the match against Chelsea;
    " I must say that, when I saw who was refereeing it, I feared the worst. You want a fair referee, you know … You want a strong referee, anyway, and we didn’t get that."

    He's not wrong, is he?
    Luiz should never of been on the pitch, it was worth a second yellow card that tackle on Shrek, but a little thing called karma reared it's ugly head and the Indebted lost.

    For those who say that ol'Beetroot is a bit of a hypocrite, well, your right, but which manager wouldn't be? Wenger would indeed do the same as would any other manager worth his salt, it's just the way it is. What will be interesting to see is if the FA let him get away with making that comment. I understand that they're not to keen on the integrity of their refs being brought into question, this is afterall a public statement and not just hearsay, time will tell.

    As for Cashley Hole shooting an intern? Well? You just can't make this shit up, could ya? Was he aiming for John Terry? I suppose we could forgive him for that.

    ReplyDelete
  133. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/teams/m/man_utd/9413347.stm

    Let's see if he can get away with it.

    ReplyDelete
  134. Probably will H .... damn fuckwit will undoubtedly bribe the powers that be to get out of it.

    ReplyDelete
  135. Manchester City defender Kolo Toure has been suspended after testing positive for a specified substance.

    ------------------------------------------
    Really?? Footballer doing drugs?? I'd never have believed it. Well, it certainly couldnt be the performance enhancing kind.

    ReplyDelete
  136. Notts County manager Paul Ince would pick John F Kennedy, Tiger Woods and his wife Claire as his guests at his dream dinner party, but says "it would have to be a takeaway. I'm not a great cook so it would have to be McDonald's or KFC".
    Full story: Yahoo Sport
    ------------
    Yuck, it would smell terribly at that dinner table, the odour of rotten corpses would be horrid.....

    I bet JFK would ming a bit too.

    ReplyDelete
  137. Wha ...? Ince would put his wife and Woods in the same room?


    Foooooooliiiiiish.

    ReplyDelete
  138. G'day all

    AnfieldHopeful said...

    If it makes you feel better Noel, he's my captain :). I see you have displaced jacks from the 2nd place and are fast closing in on me. good show mate!
    ======================================================

    Sorry AH but that's me closing in on your ass.

    H2... he is wrong. It is fine to think those things or mention such things to friends but you do not say them in a public forum. I think it is time the FA sorted the prick out... he thinks he can say whatever, whenever he likes and get away with it... time to put the old fucker out to pasture.

    ReplyDelete
  139. At time of AH writing that Bo, I had shot up to 2nd place. That was before the Pakistan match scores were added. It's pretty close.

    ReplyDelete
  140. 3 March 2011 13:39
    TrotterUSA said...
    MR, the only competition that matters in football is the FA Cup. I say this mindful of the small coincidence that we're still in it.
    --------------------------

    Wonder if teh FA Marketing department would have a heart attack if the FA Cup Final was Stoke City vs Bolton Wanderers. I'd happily have that as the showpiece at the end of the season just to stop teh scousers getting into Europe.

    AH - maybe it's time the FA sorted out the standard of their refs and sacked a few as Martin Atkinson was absolutely awful. remember when Stuart Atwell gave a goal for Readimng against Watford when it had gone for a goal kick and then there was a Crystal Palace game when Freddie Sears scored the ball hit the stantion at the back of the goal and came back out of the net and he gave a goal kick.

    Until refs get it right there will be criticism. I'd like to see the NFL system where they explain their decisions to teh crowd immediately after they are given

    ReplyDelete
  141. The only realistinc way to improve all this bullshit refereeing is to give the 4th offical a bluddy TV and the right to over-rule the Ref if he makes a mistake.

    How fucking hard is that?

    ReplyDelete
  142. Impossible so long as we have wank stains like Platini and Blatter running the game Spit.

    ReplyDelete
  143. Referee Damian Rubino showed a record 36 red cards in the recent match between rival Argentine teams Claypole and Victoriano Arenas. Rubino sent off all 22 players PLUS their substitutes and technical staff as a mass brawl erupted.

    _-----

    O happy days.

    ReplyDelete
  144. hehe lol .... that game makes the Old Firm clash of this week look like a playground spat in comparison of the ref sent anything that was breathing off of the pitch.

    ReplyDelete
  145. adampsb said...

    I'd like to see the NFL system where they explain their decisions to teh crowd immediately after they are given.
    ---------------------------------------------
    Horrendous idea.

    ReplyDelete
  146. I reckon I might be with Adam on this, in a way. Why not like rugby? Where you can hear the referee talking to other officials and players.

    The only reason they might not do it, is that the mic would pick up the foul verbal abuse by players they get. Personally I think if a player swears within hearing distance of the ref, it's a yellow and if they do it again their off.

    The only reason I imagine septic bladder wants to keep video replays out is that it would be a lot harder to fix matches. Why else would you be against correct informed decisions being made?

    ReplyDelete
  147. If it was like rugby then that would be ok MR, and may even stop the players hurling abuse at the refs if it would be picked up by the mic. But like NFL, where EVERY foul is called while the game stands still? That would slow the game up too much.

    Imagine this hypothetical scenario: Man Utd are playing, let's say Wigan Athletic. Two players come together, perhaps for this example Wayne Rooney and James McCarthy. Wigan have broken up Utds attack and are breaking quickly themselves when Mr Rooney assaults Mr McCarthy with his elbow. The ref awards a freekick to Wigan. McCarthy somehow stays on his feet and wants to take the freekick quickly while they still have Utd on the back foot. But instead, the game has to come to a halt while Mr Clattenburg tells the world 'Foul. Utd player. Number 10. Illegal use of the elbow.' By which time, all the Utd defence is back in position and the chance has gone, plus everyone would wonder why a freekick has been given for an elbow to the head, but no card was produced.

    ReplyDelete
  148. Well Noel your fights of fantasy are extroadinary, if you are going to come out with such ridiculous scenarios, I just don't know if we can have a serious discussion.

    What about like tennis? Maybe the captain of each team makes a signal to the ref for a replay and they get two each a match for big decisions (ball over the line stuff)?

    ReplyDelete
  149. With regards to Ecclestones new brain wave regarding artificial rain. Why not plant mines on some tracks and perhaps the odd suicide bomber streaker while they are at it. Could you imagine what would happen to F1 (personaly I hate it) if there was a fatality after they stuck the sprinklers on?

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/motorsport/formula_one/9413796.stm

    ReplyDelete
  150. There are so many sports that utilise technology well, and it has improved their games. FIFA saying that it would slow the game up is bullshit. Some methods would, as outlined above, but there has to be some combination of other sports' policies, or even just the same policies that would work well with football. The referral system in tennis and cricket I think has improved those games. Rugby has tv replays to confirm suspect points (ball over the line etc.). You'll never erradicate all errors, but just help the refs by taking some pressure off them. If each manager had a referral each half, and used it, then they can't challenge another decision, so it's up to them to only challenge the important ones.

    ReplyDelete
  151. Ecclestone's a prat .... I thought F1 was on a drive to SAVE money recently? How's renting out a fleet of water tankers and a sprinkler system going to do that?

    ReplyDelete
  152. Especially when there are countries near by with droughts

    ReplyDelete
  153. Ecclestone's a prat???!! Steady on Star. You'll be saying next that Sepp Blatter is 'a bit of a tit'. These are fine respected leaders of their respective sports.

    ReplyDelete
  154. tits and prats ... much better than calling them corrupt, self serving, senile, inept, useless wankers eh Noel?

    ReplyDelete
  155. Star,
    would you rather Spurs win the Premier, Champions league or go through an entire season without injuries?

    ReplyDelete
  156. I'd take silverware, every time MR.

    Seeing as the Prem's out of reach this year ...who knows? We might get lucky and prove there's something in the 'Year ends in 1' legend that surrounds the team.

    ReplyDelete
  157. You didn't really answer the question. Champs or Prem?

    ReplyDelete
  158. Prem then. We'd join a fairly exclusive set of clubs then.

    ReplyDelete
  159. Arsenal stronger says Nasri!!!
    About Barca:-
    "We are more macho, physically and psychologically, Some of us, like Theo Walcott, Jack Wilshere, even myself, we have all stepped up. "We are stronger. All of our players can compete with all of theirs."

    "This year we said, 'Look, they are fantastic and if we lose to them it will be normal because they are the best team in the world.' So there was no pressure on us and we played our normal game and showed everyone we can beat them and be at their level.”

    About progressing:-
    "If we beat Barcelona, I would love to play one of the other London clubs in the final and I want Arsenal to be the first club from London to win the Champions League.

    "But my dream would be to play against Marseille in the quarterfinals, then Tottenham in the semifinals, then Chelsea in the final," he added.

    ReplyDelete
  160. Crikey it's a tall order. Barcelona, Marseille, Tottenham then Chelsea, back to back winning? I would like Arsenal to do it but I think the prem is more realistic.

    The next games for utd and Arsenal are crucial, Fergie could be banned (two extra games from previous mouth sh*ttage).

    ReplyDelete
  161. Haha, those are just dreams. It doesnt even happen like that on my FIFA 11 season I play.

    ReplyDelete
  162. mornin' Lads,

    Villa eh, put a kids team out against City in the cup with the Bolton game in mind....what's the game coming to? Fine the bastards and give us the 3 points. It's quite flattering really, don't think that's ever happened to Bolton before!

    ReplyDelete
  163. Happy days, Fergies gonna get a huge ban because a referee fucked up. I've seen managers say stronger things about referees over smaller mistakes and get a slap on the wrist. The only thing I don't agree with Fergie about is the penalty cuz I think it was a penalty but everything else is spot-on. As per-usual United are going to be made an example of.

    ReplyDelete
  164. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  165. Don't worry Rod. SAF will appeal and get a suspended sentence (again) and he'll be back on the touchline watching Rooney elbow anyone getting in the way and telling us "it was nothing", in no time.

    ReplyDelete
  166. SAF has turned his pacemaker to 'stun'

    ReplyDelete
  167. And the microphones off;

    Manchester United boss Sir Alex Ferguson is refusing to speak to the club's own television station after being charged with improper conduct for his criticism of referee Martin Atkinson.
    Full story: the Guardian

    ReplyDelete
  168. is the venerable gentleman having a Senior or a Kevin Keegan Moment?

    if he's having a senior Kevin keegan moment we can laugh as they crumble to football dust

    football dust is the residue of a cremated football, btw

    ReplyDelete
  169. Is football dust the substance that Coca-Kolo Toure was using?

    ReplyDelete
  170. Gary Neville has won planning permission for a Teletubby-style eco-home largely built underground on moorland outside Bolton.
    Full story: Manchester Evening News

    ----
    No punchline needed.

    ReplyDelete
  171. I'd Luv it I'd luv it if he got suspended.

    H2H
    It can't be suspended this time cos he has a 2 match ban already suspended already hanging over him, hence his silence. He could miss the next 4/5 matches!

    ReplyDelete
  172. MR.

    Never underestimate the FA's capacity to buckle when it comes to anything Utd.

    ReplyDelete
  173. no H you've got it rong they're victims I tells ya, victims! is it because I is black (and red)?

    that nice lad Wayne jogs past and playfully ruffled some chaps hair- ask that nice clappandburp fella - and everyone acts like it was a forearm smash to the ear or summat

    ReplyDelete
  174. football dust is like gold dust only more expensive and crapper

    ReplyDelete
  175. Clappandburp, classic!!

    Yeah blogs, I shouldn't be so hard on the Indebted, they're always getting the shitty end of the stick, being made example of and their manager is always in hot water for apparently nothing. Shame on me.

    ReplyDelete
  176. if nevilles roof falls in hell have to burrow his way out

    I can see that sleak bewhiskered face emerging from the collapsed set like the rat he is

    when they have a family gathering it will be like a scene in tales from from the fuckin riverbank

    ReplyDelete
  177. o and by the way I fucking hate man utd but I'm not an abu as I also wouldn't want to see millwall or stoke win it.

    ReplyDelete
  178. LATEST NEWS JUST IN

    Sir Alex Ferguson is refusing to speak to his wife or his own reflection in the mirror.

    Derek Acorah has been called in to mediate and via his spirit agent Buzz Matty, we have received the following ectoplasmic communique....

    "They're all cunts especially that red faced fella in the mirror . Fuck off the lot of you. "

    ReplyDelete
  179. EVEN LATEREST NEWS JUST IN ...

    Sir Alex Ferguson is refusing to speak to his team, in a move which has begun to trouble the Old Trafford kleptocracy...

    Derek Acorah has transmitted the following in a squeaky voice from spirit agent Buzz Matsby, ....

    "Cunts. They're all cunts. "

    Well, hard to disagree with that.

    ReplyDelete
  180. Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger believes Kolo Toure's failed drugs test is a result of the player taking a "slimming product belonging to his wife".


    Trott, perhaps you can explain to me why toure is taking Mrs wengers slimming pills.

    Weird.

    ReplyDelete
  181. EVEN LATELIER THEN ALL THE OTHER REALLY LATEREST NEWS, IN FACT NOT EVEN IN YET.

    Sir Alex Fergiscum is refusing to speak to anyone......

    Hold on... That doesn't make sense. How would we know if he wouldn't tell us??

    Sneaky SAF's found a loophole to use against the FA. The I'm not talking to you defence, briliant!!

    ReplyDelete
  182. I reckon he's swallowed her vibrating rubber belt.

    ReplyDelete
  183. I would respond to that post H but I'm on magic mushrooms and I think Im SAF so I'm not speaking to anyone and this doesn't count because I have started not speaking yet

    ReplyDelete
  184. or her running machine, trott

    ReplyDelete
  185. no wait, it'd be difficult to inhale a thigh master through a straw, can't be that.

    ReplyDelete
  186. Toure Swallows Running Machine

    much better headline than footballer fails drugs test

    ReplyDelete
  187. You could always cut it into smaller pieces using a razor though?

    Could be the next best thing. I'm gonna call some mates in Amsterdam.

    ReplyDelete
  188. blogdignag said...
    Toure Swallows Running Machine

    ---
    I thought I hadn't seen SWP for a while.

    ReplyDelete
  189. Toure Snorts Wengers wifes Liposuction

    he's got the 12-gauge nostrils for it

    ReplyDelete
  190. H - Hehe I can imagine the little fella running up and down toures gastrointestinal tract tripping over the epiglotis getting his head stuck in the anus etc. He's got burger stands in there you know.

    But no burgers

    ReplyDelete
  191. Fucked up;

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-12651240

    ReplyDelete
  192. highly fucked up indeed H, Bells will be on a plane over there to check on him tomorrow.

    ReplyDelete