Sunday, 7 October 2012

Cole In A Hole

It comes as little surprise that Ashley Cole has described the FA as a #bunchoftwats on his Twatter account. Cole knows a twat when he sees one but he thinks the FA's twattiness derives from insinuations that he lied for his mate John Terry. (I'm not saying he lied. He just backed up a very curious version of the truth.)

The FA report suggested that Terry's briefs - his legal team, not what he leaves on the  floor of teammate's bedrooms - managed to put together a case for the defence that was highly dubious, namely that the England centre-half (the former England centre half, I mean - and doesn't that sound good!) was repeating something that Anton Ferdinand said to him.

In other words the conversation went something like this:

AF: John!
JT: Yes Anton?
AF: Are you calling me a fucking black cunt?
JT: (confused as if unsure what was just said) Fucking black cunt...?

Somehow Ashley witnessed this conversation himself, from somewhere in the freezer of your local Londis if Rio Ferdinand's tweeting affirmation is to be believed, and potentially added something to the effect of: "Careful there, John. If anyone heard that out of context they must just misunderstand."

Well the FA have screwed up that version of events in their fists as if like they were Vinnie Jones doing an especially tight bit of man-marking. And quite right too.

We can leave aside the slightly arcane discussion about whether Terry - and indeed Suarez - are racists or simply nice lads who used racist language in the heat of the moment (though in Luis's case that moment lasted pretty much 90 minutes). The fact is the FA took the chance to lay down the law with Suarez and most of us thought that very admirable. Terry, for a less frequent but even more blatant piece of name-calling gets four games to sit somewhere quietly and wash out his toilet mouth.

Now half as long seems quite simply to be bloody feeble. The FA makes a bold stance one week and the next time the issue is raised it halves the sentence. You can only conclude one of two things:that the FA has a graduated scale for acts of racism (although you'd think 'fucking black cunt' might be at one end of the scale); or that Teflon Terry is a special case, given that he's English and not one of those sweary, divey Uruguayan types. But it couldn't be that. Cos that'd be racist.

(By the way, there's no point in Liverpool players bleating that Suarez can't win penalties anymore - there is a natural justice to the fact that refs just assume he's diving, and that leaves a lot of us with a great sense of satisfaction.)

So yes, Ashley, the FA are a bunch of twats, but not cos they are sceptical about what comes out of your mouth. If that were a qualification then Cheryl and Cheryl's Mum would be high up the twat list. No they are twats because they have been wilfully inconsistent. Racism is, well, racism.

Cole won't play against San Marino. (That'll teach him.) I could have confirmed that with Roy Hodgson yesterday but I got on the wrong train. But at least Cole has apologised for his knee-jerk tweet. His mate doesn't appear to have said sorry for anything in his life. It's that kind of self-belief that makes him such a consistent performer on the pitch and such a consistent tosser off it.

Were Terry to come out and apologise, condemn such behaviour and express serious remorse we might be on to some sort of turning point in the issue, but that's not his way. He's many things, John Terry, but ever so 'umble isn't one of them.

It's a shame that, in the meantime, Chelsea have developed a playing style that's very easy on the eye. Indeed, the opening seven or so weekends of the Premier League season have been hugely entertaining generally.

Cazorla has been the outstanding new signing, with the likes of Hazard and Mirallas not far behind. Everton and the Baggies might just cause a flurry or two of interest in the top half, while the bottom end looks confirming that Mark Hughes is one of the most obscenely overrated managers in football history.

And as for the European fixtures I find myself fully shorn of any sense of national loyalty these days. United's win in Cluj, the build-up punctuated by ludicrous vampire references as ever, was a bit disappointing. Citeh's fluked draw at home to Dortmund, thanks almost entirely to Joe Hart covering his goal like a human bedsheet, was a tad irritating too.

Citeh have now fully attained the status enjoyed by Chelsea after one season of Mourinho, where their limitless power to buy completely outweighs any respect for their quality and position. If Citeh win, it's a case of 'Of course they fucking did.'

Dortmund, in the likes of Reus, Bender, Gotze and Hummels, look like a German side because they are. Take away Hart and Citeh are just playing a bunch of arrant mercenaries on six-figure weekly salaries. Maybe we envy success in this country but I just want them to lose every match they play. Apart from United where a draw would be fine. May their struggles in Europe continue for as long - no longer - than Chelsea's did.













170 comments:

  1. Good stuff Robbo. Thought it said Cole an A-Hole.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's like a crap football version of kurasawa's Roshomon, different versions of the same story all leading to the general conclusion that everyone involved is a corrupt and self interested git.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Just read this story:
    http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2012/oct/07/david-cameron-joins-twitter
    which includes:
    "Asked about it during a radio interview in 2009, he remarked: "The trouble with Twitter, the instantness of it – too many tweets might make a twat." He later apologised for the comments."
    Yet he continues to be PM, so possibly AC having followed same route, will be excused by FA.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hmmm, thinking about the severity of Terry's ban vs Suarez 8 weeks, I think a lot of it has to do with the intent. Whatever he was saying (or meaning) Suarez was obviously getting under Evra's skin (bad pun) so he kept on doing it. It seems that whatever Terry said to Anton Ferdinand didn't really affect him (Ferdinand) and so there was less of an intent to upset by repeated insults.

    I know the FA making sense is not likely, but does this provide any kind of rationale?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Well said as always, Robbo. Especially your direct quotes from the Terry/Ferdinand discussion. Where did you get access to such accurate material? Careful not to tweet it or McNutter will post it on his blog and call it journalism.

    I don't understand why Hodgson didn't call up an entire squad of uncapped players for the San Marino and Poland matches. You'll win the first and draw the second even with a selection of my fellow posters.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/19865337
    Very disappointing. Don't understand AVB's reasoning. Lloris is a great keeper, but they should have waited until next year to buy him. Or let him be a cup keeper for one season; it isn't as if they won't go far in multiple competitions and keep him reasonably busy. Then you let Friedel go at the end of the season, record intact. Though to be fair, I did favor AVB clearing out the oldies at Chelsea, and he failed miserably at that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Friedel has been winning us points all season, Stephen. But he hasn't kept a clean sheet yet. Lloris has played three games and kept two. And we won lastnight and got three points, so AVB can feel justified. He was slated for not playing him, and is now being slated for playing him. Just the crusade against him that he's having to deal with. I believe his price this summer was as low as it was going to be for a while, and so the transfer was made now instead of later to save some wonga.

      Delete
  6. Also, looks my side have returned to their winning ways and I've taken down Colch. Relatively static in the European positions for head to head. Top of one classic league, second in the other. For now, anyway. These things are generally too good to last.

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  7. Well said as ever, Robbo. Have I missed something or would all this carp have been avoided if JT had apologised to Anton after the game along the lines of, "Sorry, mate, I just lost it, I was totally out of order etc. etc"? Of course the question doesn't arise because JT is such an arrogant canute that it is simply not in his DNA as his ilk consider an apology to be a sign of weakness. A career in politics surely beckons!!

    Spider

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    Replies
    1. Hadn't thought of that. JT for PM. I'd vote for him. Were he to be campaigning from the opposing side first, he could go with the slogan:

      John Terry: Captain. Opposition Leader. Knob-End.

      Though I imagine if you mentioned "shadow secretary" he would try to mark the administrative staff.

      Delete
    2. Now I've got an image of JT skulking around Whitehall stuck in my head.

      Delete
  8. Very good blog, Robbo. I've always been slated by my mates for not being patriotic enough when it comes to English teams playing in Europe. It doesn't matter who they're playing, I always want Utd to lose. They could be playing an Evil Dictators XI and I'd still cheer as Pol Pot scored the winner. Utd are a greater evil, in my opinion. That's why I never have Utd players in my FFL teams. Fact.

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    Replies
    1. Ditto ditto hence the fantasy team being noscum utd and that night in the nou camp vs bayern being the single worst night of my life! Thank god twatter wasn't around then!!
      Bisq

      Delete
  9. Twitter eh. I have stupid little thoughts all the time, I keep them to myself except with friends family. And the ones I post on here but even I'm not stupid enough to tell you who I really am.

    I'm in two minds though. On the one hand it's good to know what small brained immature narcissists people like Cole and Hamilton are (hamilton has just had to apologise when he tweeted that button had disrespected him by unfollowing him on twatter...turns out he never followed him in the first place: playground stuff)

    On the other hand I think they should all keep their dignity by denying themselves the opportunity to reveal their stupidity in public by SHUTTING THE FUCK UP.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Have to agree with that, Blog. The trouble with instantly being able to share your "thoughts" with the rest of the world is that the rest of the world simply doesn't always need or want to know them (Cashley is a case in point). And surely JT should have been given an extra game or two's ban if he had anything to do with Cashley allegedly changing his story? I think it's called "perverting the course of justice", but S Yorks Bill would be able to explain that better than I can).


      Jedi

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  10. Cole having a little baby pop at shearer now.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Whoa..for a moment there I thought Cole was having a baby with Shearer.

      Delete
    2. Nice user name there, a9698a42-32c5-11e0-ad66-000bcdcb5194. Mind if I call you a9?

      Delete
    3. According to wikipedia:

      Former Wimbledon manager Joe Kinnear was appointed manager on 26 September 2008. But in February 2009, Kinnear was admitted to hospital following reports of heart trouble, and subsequently underwent heart surgery, withdrawing from his managerial duties while on convalescent leave. Alan Shearer was appointed interim manager in his absence.

      Under Shearer, the club were relegated to the Football League Championship at the end of the 2008–09 season, the first time the club had left the Premier League after joining it in 1993.

      Alan Shearer wants the Blackburn job, also wanted the Newcastle United job. What qualifies him to only apply for EPL jobs at clubs he has played for? Most managers have to start in lower leagues to prove themselves first before moving upwards and onwards. If his punditry on MotD is anything to go by, I reckon Blackburn would probably get relegated from the Championship.

      Delete
  11. What I want to know is why Ivanovic didn't give his eye-witness report. In all the pictures of Terry and Ferdinand bitching at each other, Ivanovic is in the middle separating them. Surely a good place to be to hear what was actually said? Maybe Chelsea asked what he heard and when he said 'he called him a black cunt' they decided his testimony may be somewhat prejudicial to Terry's case.

    I think this twitter craze will die down in a year or two and it'll go the way of the shell-suit, Pocket Simon and Pet Shop Boys.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not sure on this Noel. Unlike the shell suit, Pocket Simon and the Pet Shit Boys, twitter does actually have a useful function.

      You'd have thought the "independent panel" would have chosen who to call as witnesses, not Chelski, though.


      Jedi

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  12. Noel and Jedi I think you'll find the consistently excellent Pet Shop Boys are still going and have recently released their 11th studio album which was in the Top 10 just like the previous 10 studio albums. They have a new single out next week, a project based on Alan Turing out at Christmas and a new tour next year and they are far more useful than twitter which is there for celebrities to talk crap and trolls to offend people on.

    Listen to their song Ego Music and that'll tell you what they think of celebrities on Twitter

    ReplyDelete
  13. A prudent man concealeth knowledge: but the heart of fools proclaimeth foolishness [Prov. 12:23].

    Or in laymans terms;

    It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear to be a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.

    I don't use twitter, I find the whole narcisstic thoughts behind that anyone is really intrested in anybody elses drivel a bit sickening. For the so called Celebs and those in the spotlight it is a potential minefield of bad publicity and lawsuits.

    For the nouveax (read lazy) journalists it is a source of misinformation that's way too easily picked up and fogged off as news. Here's a perfect example;

    http://www.101greatgoals.com/blog/lolz-carl-jenkinson-denies-his-dad-was-a-singer-in-arsenal-presser-pre-olympiakos/

    I loved the way the "journo" says 'that after doing a bit of research' he had found out...

    Research my arse, he'd read a tweet from a guy who runs a blog, and has a tongue in cheek, Little Known Facts section, other tweets include;

    'Francis Coquelin appeared on the French version of X-Factor in 2007 as part of a teenage DeBarge tribute act.'

    - 'As a child Santi Cazorla lost the little toe on his left foot. Doctors replaced it by attaching a toe shaped piece of spicy chorizo.'

    - 'Laurent Koscielny's father was eaten by a Sarlacc during the Paris-Dakar rally in 1997.'

    Put that on your front page, intrepid reporter.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "I don't use twitter, I find the whole narcisstic thoughts behind that anyone is really intrested in anybody elses drivel a bit sickening."
      ----------------------
      Abso-fucking-lutely the truth. I couldn't agree more.

      Noel, you smart alec, the A9 user is me, for some reason blogger chooses to call me that despite me signing in.

      AH (incase I still get called a9 something_

      Delete
    2. Ah, now that you mention it....

      Delete
  14. Terry should have been banned for atleast the double amount of games given how Suarez is only a bloody foreigner who better 'respect' our culture where we dont tolerate racism and Terry the England captain therefore has/had a higher responsibility.

    FA really are a bunch of twats.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Suarez is indeed one of those sweary, divey Uruguayan types;

    http://ballsdot.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/suarezgif.gif

    But he's getting some stiff competition from a cheaty chimpy British type;

    http://i.minus.com/iI04qBVyEBQp2.gif

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  16. Spit.

    Indeed they are, but nowadays everybody involved in the sport live on a different plane of exsistance then the rest of us.

    We're all here discussing if Terry got off lightly with a 4 game ban or Suarez was too heavily punished but in reality they both got away with it.

    Ashley Cole gets sanctioned and fined more money then most of us earn in a few years, but again in reality he got away with it too.

    How many of you can say that you'd get away with abusing a co-worker with a racial tinted profinity or calling out your direct employers on a public forum as a bunch of twats?

    You'd be lucky to still have a job.

    ReplyDelete
  17. indeed. Can't believe Chelski have kept him as club captain though. Even if was just cosmetic they should have made someone else captain (prefereably Torres so that the wight of expecxtation stops hims coring again)

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    Replies
    1. I actually expected nothing else from Chelsea.

      A club owned by a man from the Russian mafia who in a court case against him, in Britain of all places, gave evidence that yes his accuser received many millions in bribe to award contracts...

      Class act.

      Delete
  18. AHHHHH, now we know the rest of the story....The A9 is a major road running from the Falkirk council area in central Scotland to Scrabster Harbour, Thurso in the far north, via Stirling, Bridge of Allan, Perth and Inverness. At 273 miles (439 km), it is the longest road in Scotland and the fifth-longest A-road in the United Kingdom. Historically it was the main road between Edinburgh and John o' Groats, and has been called the spine of Scotland.

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  19. Looks like the FA has now charged Cashley with misconduct. What a #bunchoftwats.

    Go on, ban the scumbag. And, if you agree with the tribunal that he changed his evidence (under oath), that's perjury.

    And Alan Hansen (who bleeds Liverpool) says Suarez goes down too easily (not possible: ask Linda Lovelace).

    So that's why he doesn't get any penalties: even the refs think he's a diving FA Panellist.


    Jedi

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  20. A9 is pickled onion monster munch in the vending machine I used today.

    Btw I bought a mars bar. I needed a rest though so I only ate a third of it.

    ReplyDelete
  21. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Replies
    1. There was a dead rat in k9. Od'd on peanut m n'ms

      Delete
  23. "I don't use twitter, I find the whole narcisstic thoughts behind that anyone is really intrested in anybody elses drivel a bit sickening."
    ------------------------------------------------------------

    Isn't that what we do here H2 ;]

    "FA will not charge Robin van Persie over 'elbow' incident"

    One of the benefits when joining Un**ed

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I thought we were all here posting differing points of discussion as part of a serious dialogue inspired by an in-depth and seriously pondered piece of journalism offered on a weekly basis by our host (unless he's at the caravan or stuck in the Bluebell). On a personal level I have often been inspired to undertake research of various subjects by very virtue of their mention here and have deduced that this is an educative forum that broadens the mind and provides answers to many of life's most important questions. The Jaffa Cake issue comes to mind.

      Delete
    2. Trotts right bo you get a better class of drivel on here. OK not better as such but definitely longer. You can't really drivel effectively in 140 characters.

      Delete
    3. Trotts, don't get too deep or they'll revoke your US residency.

      Delete
    4. Point taken. The drivel here is of a higher standard and you have greater freedom to drivel at length in one post.

      You are correct Trott, this site is educational... only the other day I learned that Paulie was a deep and insightful chap and was amazed to discover that PSB records are, considered by some, to contain music. The major difference for me however, is I am allowed to post here without getting in the shit.

      Delete
    5. Not entirely true. Van Persie (like Bergkamp before him) had a vicious streak when he was a Gooner too.


      Jedi

      Delete
  24. Trott,

    looks like Owen Coyle is Bolton manager no more.

    Well, at least they are not in the bottom three of the Premier League any more like when he started at Bolton....

    ReplyDelete
  25. In other news..... Steave Keane is up for the Bolton job. Any takers?

    ReplyDelete
  26. So Owen Coyle to Blackburn because the press think he is the Scottish Guardiola.Then Kean or Keane which ever is keaner to Bolton job done
    Del

    ReplyDelete
  27. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/19872455

    I read (skimmed, whatever) a McNutter piece about the new training center, as I didn't realize he had written it when I clicked the link. Should have known from the quote "This will make English football better" as hard-hitting journalism, given that the quote appears nowhere in the actual story, just the link from the homepage.

    What stuck out the most, however, was that your U17 team is a bunch of guinea pigs. I suppose you do have to try something different since your youth system does need improvement, but you better hope you don't play Ecuador.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Well, no surprise there, shame but them's the breaks. He's a nice bloke and handled the whole Muamba situation brilliantly well. Some ridiculous signings and a shame that they had to sell Cahill. Good luck to Owen Coyle. It'll take more than a new manager to fix Bolton.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Surely would take more than a new manager to fix Bolton(about 100 men with bulldozers might do the trick).
    But maybe Roy Keane would do a resurrection of the Trotters
    Del

    ReplyDelete
  30. Bo.

    This doesn't count as noone except us really reads this. ;)
    And what Trotts said.

    Jedi.

    You are indeed correct, RvP like Dennis before him had a mean streak, a lot of the best players do.

    It's easy to be blind to a players deficiencies when they play for the team you support, we all do it, one mans hero is another mans villian. Still, even that reasoning doesn't explain why the Chavfans still blindly follow JT.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Shame about Owen Coyle, but no one can say that he didn't get a fair go. They stuck with him after being relagated, but alas he couldn't stop the slide.

    ReplyDelete
  32. I've been counting the characters here Blog but haven't got to 140 yet. I got you, H2, Spit, Colch, Noel, Bo, Jacks, Adam, Rasta, Del, A9, AH, Jedi, Anon, Profile, Nana, Rupert, Stephen, Anon again, Anon and on, Joe Davis Roach, Gaz UTD, Preach, another Anon, Del, TommyB and a dead rat.

    ReplyDelete
  33. oh and a topless lass with a Chelsea scarf covering her nipples.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was going to ask who she was but it turns out JT has already claimed her.

      Delete
  34. Hiw is Garth Crocks still in a job, he's incompetant beyond belief.

    Last week, as Noel pointed out, he refered to Jan Vertongen as a Dutch defender, this week he's full of praise for West Brom's James Morrison, writing;

    'This is a player Roy Hodgson should now be taking a keen interest in.'

    Really Garth, even though he plays for Scotland?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. To be fair to Crocks, when I first watched a TH game on the box this season (sorry to mention them, H2H) having failed to keep up with the transfer scene, I kept looking for a short swarthy bloke with a Fellaini-style haircut built like a brick outhouse because I thought the commentator was referring to "The Tongan" obviously not to be confused with a 6' 6" blond Dutchman!

      Spider

      Delete
    2. Vertonghen is Belgian!!!

      Delete
  35. Luckily H, Hodgson spent 18 months at WBA in the company of Mr. Morrison and won't need to take advice from Garth on this one, even if we do play Scotland in the World Cup Final.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Indeed Trott, another fact overlooked by Garth.

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  37. Crooks is worse than Lawrenson, but only just.

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    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
  38. Anon, I was prepared to say he was brainless, incompetant and totally crap at what he does.....

    But what you've said is below the belt stuff. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  39. what's wonga with mike cashley?

    He'd accept sponsorship from al quaeda if they were the highest bidder.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Apparently Commons made the Scottish squad. So much for a 25-man roster. Lords already signed on for cricket?

    Charlie Adam re: Gareth Bale:

    "He's good and he's quick... If we can stop him it will probably enhance our chances of winning the game."

    With insights like that he has a career as a BBC football blogger waiting for him.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/19879192

    ReplyDelete
  41. That dead rat at K9 was looking so peaceful and vulnerable in his vending machine sepulchre that I decided to shell out 60 p and buy him.

    The plan was to erect a pet sized mausaleum, with little statues of rats and little porticoes with friezes of battling rats modelled on the helicarnassus 7 wonder original but in the way home I got peckish.....

    ReplyDelete
  42. 60p? That's quite reasonable. Was it a full grown rat or a fun size?

    ReplyDelete
  43. Rats at K9?

    I thought KFC had the monopoly on those.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Never understood the concept of fun size. Wouldn't it be more fun if it were bigger?

    ReplyDelete
  45. That's what I used to yell my Japanese girlfriend ..."its fun size!"

    She used to say "物の哀れ"

    ReplyDelete
  46. I saw a pie shaped rat eating a rat shaped pie. It was a pirate

    ReplyDelete
  47. 誰もとにかくこのクソたわごとを読まない

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. が書き込まれたのと、読み取り

      Delete
    2. 不十分な翻訳日本人はMcNumptyよりも優れています

      Delete
    3. 物の哀れ
      Pathetic thing

      無常
      Transience

      誰もとにかくこのクソたわごとを読まない
      Do not read this fucking shit anyway everyone

      が書き込まれたのと、読み取り
      And when it was written, read

      不十分な翻訳日本人はMcNumptyよりも優れています
      Insufficient Japanese translation is better than McNumpty

      Transience?? You're right about McNumpty though

      Delete
  48. Just got to this,sorry.
    Top work apu.
    Can't disagree with a single word.
    Hope it's bye bye Cashley and welcome Leighton. We could do with a decent penalty-taker...

    ReplyDelete
  49. Could Jimmy Savile lose knighthood over abuse claims?
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-19884359

    Jimmy Savile's grave to be dismantled in Scarborough
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-york-north-yorkshire-19889974

    Check out the headstone: at the base it says: "It was good while it lasted" -- wonder what it means?

    I'm not sure whether the headline means that Savile's grave in Scarborough is to be dismantled, or that it's being dismantled in Scarborough.

    ReplyDelete
  50. Barcelona deny link to banned doctor Luis García del Moral who worked with Lance Armstrong and US Postal


    Narcalona?

    ReplyDelete
  51. Football Association launches code of conduct for England players



    It's a short document it just reads..


    "I the undersigned promise to stop being such a twat "

    ReplyDelete
  52. Trott, McCarthy replacing Coyle?... things keep getting worse for you guys... at least it isn't Kean(o).

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  53. McCarthy? Are you fuckin' kidding me?

    ReplyDelete
  54. please allow me to re-phrase that.

    McCarthy? That's great news, always rated him. Terrific man manager, brilliant tactician, Premier League here we come. Happy Days are here again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Apparently Ole Gunnar Solskjaer is in the frame for the Bolton job. He has done a good job at Molde.

      Delete
    2. So it's either the Ole from Molde, or mouldy ol' McCarthy.

      Delete
  55. Hope mcarthy gets it

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA cough cough HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....

    ReplyDelete
  56. Sorry that should read....

    Well let's hope for trotts sake the saturnine human cartoon from yorkshire in Ireland doesn't get the job.

    ReplyDelete
  57. "Spanish Football Federation president Angel María Villar Llona, who is also a Fifa Executive Committee member, says he remains firmly against goal-line technology but says it would take too long to explain why.
    ===============================================
    Did I read that right ? A FIFA executive committee member is against something the whole world has been clamouring for, for years, but he couldn't be arsed to say why ?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe he meant it would take him too long to say why because he felt he had to do so in Icelandic, which is a notoriously difficult language to learn.

      Delete
  58. Lots of hoopla going on about the whole Wonga situation going on at Newcastle. Seems to me a bit wierd because I don't remember ever hearing anything about them when Blackpool had them on their shirts in the PL.

    To tell the truth I had no idea who Wonga were before this week, but now that there have been MP's coming out of the woodwork putting in their tuppance worth I now know exactly who they are and what they do. Ironically those complaining about Newcastle promoting this company have insured that they've had more media exposure then any shirt deal could have possibly given them.

    What I also find quite sad are those in the FA who are of the opinion that it may be a bad influence to the kids having a money lender as a sponser, yet there are a vast number of teams who are sponsered by online betting companies.

    It's even more hypocritical when you take into consideration that the League Cup has been known as the Carling Cup and that this years FA Cup will be brought to you by Budweiser. Now, leaving aside the fact that those two brands are closer to fizzy piss then lager, they are still classed as alcohol, but in the ultimate wisdom of the FA this is not considered a bad influence to the kids?

    The most laughable aspect is that now even the moslims are getting involved, citing the Sharia Law, which I also had to google, saying that it would be wrong for Demba Ba, Cisse, Tiote and Ben Hates Arthur to promote money lenders..........

    Hold up..... Don't these players play in the Barclays Premier League? Banks still lend money right? and I'm pretty sure they don't do it out of the goodness of their hearts.

    Who are Newcastles current sponsers? Oh yeah Virgin money, what the fuck do they do then? Doesn't that break Sharia Law too or has Richard Branston found a loophole?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It could always have been worse I guess.

      http://www.whoateallthepies.tv/lists/5408/top_10_funny_sh.html

      Delete
    2. Milan had POOH on their shirt, heh.

      Delete
    3. If the FA are harrumping about having a money lender as a sponsor, who sponsors the Premier League and what is their core business? I can only assume the FA are sponsored by Rent-A-Twat.

      Spider

      Delete
    4. Apologies, H2H, I was so wound up about what those quarter-wits at the FA were doing that I didn't realise you'd covered it further down. However, if the religious zealots are up in arms about this, all it needs is for Cashley to tweet a foul-mouthed tirade against Islam and the Shi'ite will really hit the fan!

      Spider

      Delete
    5. Well said H. It's all just hypocritical snobbery. Wongas business model is immoral and just this side of legal but barclays built their capital base from the slave trade ffs (which its airbrushed wikipedia. Page omits to mention, see http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/british/abolition/building_britain_gallery_02.shtml)

      They supported apartheid SA, supported mugabe, was involved in tax evasion, money laundering for Iran, libor rate fixing, and helped nearly wreck the UK economy, needing a billion pounds handout despite being worth a couple of trillion accumulated mainly by ripping people off the BASTARDS .....but that's all okay because the brand name doesn't suggest the image of the exploited poor on council estates.

      Delete
    6. Blog, for a second there I missed the Wonga/Barclay part and thought you were talking about the UK itself.

      (And before I touch off another Falklands/Hawaii debate, I'm sure the US' list of devious deeds would be similar to yours if we had been around as long as you.)

      Delete
    7. I think the US has done a marvellous job of catching up though Stephen.

      Delete
    8. Catching up AH? Surpassing is the correct adjective there mate.

      Delete
  59. Replies
    1. Trying to lure in Solskjaer? Good luck. If it works, I'm going to start singing "Swedish women's MENSA volleyball team" even though it doesn't have quite the same rhythm to it.

      Delete
    2. if you delete "MENSA volleyball team" and replace "women's" with the word "tart", it works quite well.

      Delete
  60. So does the us tax payers involvement in postal services doping system mean we can kick the whole us out all sports? Means we now sit 2nd in the last Olympic table
    Bisq

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. By that logic I don't think there would be many countries left standing, including your own. Don't your taxes help support the athletes who competed in various Olympics? And haven't at least a handful of them been involved in doping?

      Of course, it makes sense that the USPS was involved. Had it been Fedex or UPS the proof would have arrived years ago.

      Delete
    2. Fair point! Have to wonder just how the Armstrong supporters will counter this report!
      I think damning is the word
      Bisq

      Delete
    3. Now we know why the us hs the worlds fastest postmen.

      Delete
  61. Hmmm... Owen blames foreigners for diving yet admits he does it, too. Can't have it both ways.

    ReplyDelete
  62. The president of the Spanish FA has claimed racism does not exist in his country's game. "There is no racism in Spanish football," said Angel Villa Llona.
    --------------------------------------

    In other news the Pope says he's not Catholic and bears have announced they prefer to use a toilet rather than the woods.

    Colch

    ReplyDelete
  63. It does sound a bit like Comical Ali the Iraqi Information Minister during the Gulf War when he said "I triple guarantee you, there are no American soldiers in Baghdad" as an American tank rolled past in the background.
    All it needed was Luis Aragonés in behind him with a banana and a Klu Klux Klan outfit.

    Colch

    ReplyDelete
  64. ive done the same as brendan rodgers - put three names in three envelopes as my predo for the seasons biggest let-downs.
    wayne rooney ....port vale....brendan rodgers

    http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/being-liverpool-brendan-rodgers-envelope-1369893

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The difference is, you'll probably still be around to open your envelope at the end of the season.

      Delete
    2. I'v done it too but I've only got one envelope - Keira Knightley.

      Delete
  65. Just one day after being told by the FA they will be implementing a code of conduct for England players and that England players are role models for the young, Wayne Rooney is named England captain.

    "Defender Daniel Agger, 27, claims he proved his loyalty to Liverpool before signing a new deal - by having the letters YNWA, standing for You'll Never Walk Alone, tattooed on the knuckles of his right hand.' They'd be the knuckles that drag on the ground beside him.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Turns out the seasons biggest let down is brazils world cup mascot a giant inflatable armadillo .... cos somebody stabbed it


    http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2012/oct/10/brazil-2014-inflatable-armadillo-mascot-stabbed

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tony Christie sung a song about that Bloggy 'Is this the way to pop armadillos'

      Delete
  67. What did the inflatable headmaster say to the inflatable boy who came into inflatable school with a pin?

    You've let me down you've let the school down bit most of all you've let yourself down

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I feel deflated after that blog.

      Delete
    2. He's just full of hot air, anyway.

      Delete
  68. News just in from Comedy Central. Apparently (I haven't watched it) C5 Documentary "Being Liverpool" has put Englkish subtitles on when Jamie Carragher speaks, but not for Pepe Reina.

    Fair enough, really.


    Jedi.

    ReplyDelete
  69. "Liverpool's Fabio Borini breaks a bone in his foot while on Italy duty"...

    Ain't that just dandy...hopefully there was a clause in AC's loan allowing us to recall him if any of our frontline players (if you can call Borini that) was injured.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The only recall clause is allowing a return in January and it was Carroll that insisted on that rather than than the Manager.

      AC won't play for Liverpool again while Brendan Rodgers is in charge But he could be back at the end of January if results don't improve

      Delete
  70. I see the FA have just underlined their commitment to the player code of conduct by making Rooney England captain.

    Must be because of his excellent tournament record. Oh ...


    Jedi

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. some have pondered that it's because earlier this week he gave Prince William some sound advice on hair plug treatment options.

      Delete
  71. They should just go all the way and make Joey Barton captain and implement a code of ex-con-duct.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Top it off with a beak and make it a code of ex-con-duck.

      Delete
  72. 5-0 against San Marino? The World Cup 2014 is in the bag. You know the opposition is bad when Danny Welbeck scores two.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. indeed Noel and I'm thinkin' it's probably an England v Wales final.

      Delete
  73. If you can get your hands on a copy of "Four Horsemen" (documentary), grab it, it is worth 90 minutes of your life.

    ReplyDelete
  74. Bo, the four great evils aren't crooked finance, terrorism, poverty and ecological collapse, they're high ticket prices, overpaid stars, low quality pies and Manchester united

    ReplyDelete
  75. I'm starting to get those two great chartity workers jimmy Armstrong and lance saville confused in my mind. I wouldn't be surprised now to learn that mother theresas operation in Calcutta was just a front for al quaeda.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Close. She wasn't with Al Qaeda, she was with ISI, the Pakistani intelligence agency.

      Delete
  76. amazing.....

    http://www.coolestone.com/media/4702/Road-Bike-Party/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Similar footage of Lance Armstrong on his way to the start line was a slight hint that he may have doped.

      Delete
  77. Anything significant about Robbo's EurWoe podcast having 666 plays?

    ReplyDelete
  78. Have you guys sign this? ;

    http://duncanjenkins.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/such-little-thing-makes-such-big.html

    Unbeliveable tale. Like LFC weren´t getting enough bad press as it is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Liverpool FC isbeing run by jokers and now thugs, apparently.

      Delete
  79. Interesting tale that H about an (apparently) arrogant cock who's (allegedly) not very good at his job of "communicating" and seems (according to my "sources") to have triad delusions (dont want dogshit thru my letter box)

    Something seems to be going badly wrong at Anfield and if they keep making these PR blunders they'll end up with a toxic brand.

    Compare Evertons success.

    ReplyDelete
  80. their next meeting is in the back office at the Bing.

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